Working an overnight shift is hard. Working an overnight shift with a cold is miserable. Working an overnight shift with a cold on a milk delivery night–when I have to spend at least an hour and a half in the cooler–is frigging horrendous. I spent most of the night cursing all lactating bovine. I’m still cursing them and am considering swearing off all dairy products. Except for milk in my cereal. And cream for my coffee. And ice cream.

And cheese.